I always get asked questions about Lilith from clients. Not only that though, but I’m constantly seeing questions about Lilith on the different forums that I creep on & answer questions. “How does she effect my life?” “What does it mean to have Lilith in Libra in the 6th House?” “What does it mean that she’s in conjunction with my Midheaven?” “Does having Lilith in the 8th make me a fucked up bitch?” These are just a few examples of questions that I’ve either received myself or just seen posted different places. I think before you can really understand HOW Lilith effects your life by placement in the natal chart, it is important to not only understand who Lilith was, but also to make sure that you know which Lilith you’re talking about; the asteroid Lilith, Black Moon Lilith, TRUE Black Moon Lilith or Dark Moon Lilith. For the purposes of this blog post, I will be focusing primarily on Black Moon Lilith (circled in Red below). From my own chart, here is an example of what these look like in one’s chart.
Black Moon Lilith is what will usually come up for the “Lilith” option on a website like Astro.com. (If you happen to want to see where the other Lilith’s fall in your chart, Asteroid Lilith is h13, and Dark Moon Lilith/Waldemath’s Moon is h58.) So, if you use Astro.com at all to create charts, Black Moon Lilith is probably the version of Lilith that you are most familiar with. And this version, circled in Red in the above example, bring together the True and Mean versions of Lilith. Black Moon Lilith isn’t an actual object in the sky, but is the apogee of the Moon’s orbit…meaning this is the place in the Moon’s orbit that is furthest from the Earth. This sort of empty-void-hypothetical-point is a place where one can do “good” or do “bad.” They can take Lilith’s intuitive and psychic energy and use to it to connect to “the other side” (and connect that other side to themselves) in a positive way, or in a negative way.
As far as the story of Lilith goes, supposedly she was created from the earth to be the wife of Adam (at the same time as Adam), before Eve. Adam wanted Lilith to be submissive to him, specifically sexually, and wanted to fuck her with him on top, and only him on top. Lilith wasn’t having any of this bullshit; she wanted the relationship to be more equal in nature and wanted to fuck in various different positions. Adam didn’t like this (and I guess God didn’t like it much, either) because it is said that she either grew some wings and flew away from that paradise prison, or that she was cast out by God for being a disobedient bad girl towards Adam. Her job was to be Adam’s bitch, and she didn’t want to play ball. It is at this point, once she is either cast out of the Garden of Eden or chooses to leave on her own, that she turns to the darker side of things (such as hooking up with and fucking some demons and having demon babies which are then killed, turning into a snake, and actually killing children). Or so the mythology says depending on what version you read. Who really knows? I DO think she gets a bad rep though (she probably doesn’t usually mind this). While I believe her energy absolutely can manifest in more challenging ways in one’s natal chart (such as obsession and the “darker” sides of sex), I also believe that she can represent wild and uninhibited freedom and/or sexuality from oppression. This isn’t a bad thing for a person to embrace, it just depends on how it is embraced. She represents the sort of “nasty woman” energy (or whatever you want to call it) that more patriarchal societies don’t want to see in their countrywomen….and if they actually had their way, would probably try and do away with completely. But that’s another rant for another time.
*As far as how Black Moon Lilith expresses herself, you will find that below with an explanation of BML in Aries through Virgo. This is will only show the HOW of how she expresses herself through the sign in question. You will also need to look at the house your BML falls in to know WHERE/WHAT AREA OF LIFE she expresses herself through, as well as taking into account any aspects that she makes in your chart.*
Black Moon Lilith in Aries: BML in Aries is very impulsive and all about expressing her knee jerk reactions. She can get quite “heated” about things that she cares passionately about, as well as about things that really piss her off. She gives plenty of drive here to the person, just depends on how this drive is utilized; does it manifest in a positive & passionate way, or does it come about with the need to dominate over certain areas of one’s life? Depending on other factors (such as house placements and any aspects that are made to BML), she could enhance your instincts in a positive way, or a negative way….instincts play a part regardless of how they manifest. Also, depending on the other factors involved, she could really drive you towards the sexy-time side of things (such as being very driven to get some, like, all the time), or she could drive you towards focusing on other things completely (not really driven towards sexy time at all). And if you are driven more towards the side that wants sex all the time, it’s probably of the more primal, physical, and even aggressive variety. To have her show up more positively, give her the independence that she needs to thrive. Just try to guide this independence into constructive or positive outlets.
Black Moon Lilith in Taurus: This is actually one of the most “natural” placements for BML, for she was created of the earth (and Taurus exhibits the female sort of earth energy in way that Capricorn and Virgo feel restricted). BML in Taurus is all about wanting to quench her desires in the 5 physical senses, and completely for herself. She is sensual, earthy, and usually quite desirable to both the same sex and the opposite sex alike. She is all about pleasure, and leisure, and really wants to manifest these in her life, and will probably go to great lengths to obtain them. She really is pretty much the ideal lover in this sense. Not having those creature comforts in her life will bring out her darker side, as will any sort of insecurity in her own self worth, and that dark side deals with possessiveness and not easily letting go of things she holds on to. She is very possessive of what is “hers” (and this can absolutely include her partner) and can also attract people to her that feel the same of her in turn. Depending on other aspects would show how she may come about in one’s life, and how to keep the possessiveness in check. Being very connected to Mother Earth in some way really stands out here, and just feels right. She needs this to function properly and positively.
Black Moon Lilith in Gemini: BML in Gemini wants (excuse me, needs) to be mentally free, and able to explore all of her different curiosities. She will easily rebel if she feels that she can’t engage her mind in this fashion, and it would probably make her feel quite anxious and “heavy”. Because we’re talking about Gemini there is a polarizing effect, oscillating between extremes . This will come out in her curiosities (and what she is actually curious about and how this effects her will be based on house location and aspects). Some of the things she will be naturally curious about will make her mind soar to new heights, and in some cases it will be like curiosity killing the cat. As far as sexuality goes, Lilith here usually has no problem trying on a variety of different partners for size to see what fits, or for the experience of it all. She might even be down for group sort of sexual activities here (no judgment if so, you do you, girl/boy). The less freedom that she feels in her own mind, or should she become more bogged down with gossip/petty shit that really doesn’t matter, the more this placement will take a negative turn.
Black Moon Lilith in Cancer: BML in Cancer is placement where she doesn’t always feel at ease. Cancer is all about feeling safe & secure, while Lilith kind of throws caution to the wind. The feeling of unease will possibly be even more prominent than in, say, Virgo, because Cancer also rules over the deepest parts of one’s conscious mind (making Cancer very privately aware of BML’s energy). BML is also very, very intuitive in Cancer, which can be used for one’s benefit. You will feel a strong need to care and nurture other people, which is fine, just make sure that this is something that you actually want to be engaged in and not something that you feel you have to do (or that you’re doing it for the “wrong” reasons). Regardless of this, you will feel a strong protectiveness towards your family & your home, but you may also feel a strong urge for freedom & independence from them as well (so the dynamic can feel off, or uneasy). The aspects and house placement in one’s chart will tell more of her story here and how work with her instead of against her. Also, sexuality here can become so private that Cancer may not allow themselves to embrace their own sexuality (especially if it’s of the kinkier variety) even behind locked doors. If this happens to be suppressed for too long, it can cause Lilith to bust at the seams and come out in real life at inappropriate times. And if this happens to be the case, this almost secrecy about sexuality, it was probably instilled in childhood somehow, someway.
Black Moon Lilith in Leo: BML in Leo needs to be able to express herself and her energy authentically and creatively. She is also very glamorous, sparkly (albeit in a slightly “darker” way), and absolutely full of charisma. She has the ability to really captivate/mesmerize her her audience and is probably able to do this with great ease. The issue of sexuality here is something that probably won’t be as difficult for one to embrace, depending on where Lilith lives in one’s chart. BML in Leo is desirable to the same & opposite sex, and this placement probably gets off somewhat on knowing this and embracing this sort of sexuality out loud. The only catch to all of this that sounds so good? The reasons behind of all of them (meaning you will want to look at house placement and aspects, for sure). Is the charisma she exudes in Leo used for manipulation purposes to the detriment of someone else, or is the Charisma actually a natural part of her authentic self? Is the openness of her sexuality something that is really part of who she is, or does she use it as a way to keep from getting hurt? Is the healthy & vivacious ego that she presents here actually real, or is it seriously super-inflated into narcissism territory? Or is the outward ego just a mask she wears because she has no firm grasp on her true self? Getting to the bottom of authenticity is super important here.
Black Moon Lilith in Virgo: BML in Virgo isn’t always the most comfortable place for her to find herself. She wants to be wild and uninhibited, and Virgo’s energy will kind of try to repress everything that BML wants to do. She wants to be wild and free, but Virgo tries to bring the reins in on her. She wants to be able to fully and freely express her sexuality, but she is held back. Virgo is rather nervous by nature, and having such a sexual sign that pretty much represents everything that Virgo is not, will make Virgo, well, nervous. Virgo doesn’t like to do anything useless, and any natural sort of embracing of Lilith here will be done through a vehicle of helping, serving, or healing. Sex here can feel like work, sex can feel like having to serve someone else, or hell, some type of sex work could even be in the cards here. You’re thinking, “what” right? Virgo does need to be of service to others, which is why I bring up work in sex the industry (Virgo making Lilith useful). Since Virgo also deals with unequal sorts of relationships, it will have to come to terms with it’s own views on the Madonna/Whore archetypes, and know that by letting Lilith come out to play in a healthy way doesn’t automatically swing you in “impure” direction. It is important that Lilith is embraced here, for I feel like it could case the native a whole host of physical & mental issues otherwise.